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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/30054483">The Lucky One</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/flcker/pseuds/flcker'>flcker</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Criminal Minds (US TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Age Difference, Amnesia, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Behavioral Analysis Unit (Criminal Minds), Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Childhood Trauma, Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers, Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Medical Trauma, Near Death Experiences, Psychological Trauma, Rescue, Slow Build, Slow Romance, Strangers to Lovers, Temporary Amnesia, Trauma, Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-15 16:30:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>5</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>13,483</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/30054483</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/flcker/pseuds/flcker</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Spencer Reid makes the decision to take in the unsub's victim.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Spencer Reid/Original Female Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Rescue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Her eyes were on fire as the bright, white lights hit them. The sound of machines beeping overpowered the soft noise of the birds singing outside her window. Her throat was screaming for water as she tried to speak. The overwhelming scent of the hospital was present despite the tubes that rested in her nose. IVs and needles in her arms were attached to all sorts of machines surrounding her hospital bed. She turned her head to the side, wincing at the pain it caused, to see a group of people in scrubs and lab coats talking with people in FBI vests. </p><p>"She's awake." One of the doctors mumbled. Every single set of eyes was on her now. </p><p>Her greasy and mangled scarlet hair was tucked behind her shoulder in a loose braid. It seemed like each bone in her body was visible through her nearly translucent and sick skin. Purple and yellowing bruises, cuts, and scars rested on almost every limb. She was so malnourished and dehydrated that if the police would have arrived any later, she surely would have been dead. The bags under her eyes were so prominent, they didn't look real. She had to fight every single day just to survive in that house. </p><p>A man and a woman approached the young girl. Her frail body laid still in the white bed, covered in blankets. </p><p>"I'm Agent Hotchner and this is Agent Jareau. We just need to ask you a couple questions." The man was older, maybe around his late thirties or early forties. He had short black hair that just barely swept across his forehead. The woman was shorter, she looked gentle. Her blonde hair fell past her shoulders. She looked to be in her late twenties. They pulled two chairs up near her bed before taking a seat. Everyone else had left except one person. He was younger and lanky. He had a mop of fluffy, chestnut colored hair on top of his head. He wore the same heavy vest as the others. </p><p>Agent Hotchner cleared his throat to get her attention, moving it away from the man standing near the door. "Do you remember what happened?"</p><p>She shook her head, much to their dismay. </p><p>He let out a sigh, "That's okay... How much can you remember?" The girl stared at him with a confused look on her face, like he was speaking another language. He furrowed his brow, sitting up in his chair. "Let's just start easy then. What's your name?"</p><p>“I- Um, I…” The blank stare on her face and the short stuttering sentence gave the agents everything they needed to know. "Reid, come over here." Agent Jareau called, summoning the man from the doorway forward. His tall figure stood at the foot of her hospital bed, examining her. </p><p>"Amnesia. I'm sure it's because of the head trauma she suffered during the raid." He paused for a few seconds. "It seems to be temporary. She should have her memories back fully in a couple months at the latest." </p><p>The blonde woman let out a sigh, "Good thing we have those video tapes."</p><p>A raspy croak came from her throat in an effort to ask a question before she was interrupted. "I would recommend staying on bedrest for the next few days, making sure you're drinking plenty of fluids. Your body suffered massive amounts of trauma and it's unwise to try and do anything too soon." The man at the foot of her bed explained. His demeanor was kind and welcoming, yet confident. He looked to be only a couple years older than the girl, ten at most. She thought it was strange how intelligent and high ranked he was for being so young.</p><p>"Stay with her." Agent Hotchner demanded as he and the other agent stood from the chairs, placing them back in the rightful place. "Try and help her piece together as much as she can."</p><p>"Yes, sir..." Reid mumbled before turning his attention toward the scarlet haired girl. "Um, do you mind if I sit?" He asked, motioning toward the end of the thin mattress. She shook her head, allowing him to take a seat. He frowned for a second, the change in emotion was sudden before he got up. He grabbed the large water bottle sitting on the bedside table. "You should drink some. I know you probably couldn't reach it on your table."</p><p>With a shaky and pained motion, she moved her arms upward. A soft hiss fell from her lips as she reached for the bottle. Her body was throbbing and aching as she moved. She was curious as to what had happened to her to be in such agony. Reid placed it in her hands as gently as possible, making sure not to hurt her. Her frail hands gripped the handles on the sides of the bottle. With a small grunt, she made an effort to meet the straw with her lips and failed, miserably. A small puddle of water dribbled down her face and onto her hospital gown. The cold liquid bit at her skin, making her wince.</p><p>Reid was quick to grab a handful of tissues, drying her neck and chin of the cool water. "I'm sorry. I should have known your motor skills weren't completely back yet. I honestly thought it was going to take you longer for you to wake up." He took the cup from her trembling hands and guided the straw between her dry yet plump lips. Once she began to drink, he cautiously took a seat closer to her, keeping the straw in her mouth. "I- Uh, I assume you want some answers. I also assume that you can't remember a thing." As he paused, she pulled away. Her dull emerald eyes watched the way his hazel orbs shimmered beneath the fluorescent lights. "Your name is Lydia Davenport and you're nineteen years old."</p><p>Her eyebrows furrow as she took in the small piece of information. Small yet labored breaths left her nose as Reid continued to talk. </p><p>"You were rescued from your uncle, Marvin Davenport's, house. And I, um maybe it's sort of... good? That you don't remember what happened just yet." He took a breath, "We found you unconscious with severe head trauma, you've been in a coma for about four days now. We figured you would have woken up a lot later than you did, considering the severity of the accident." He watched her face as her eyes travelled back between his own and the water bottle. "More?"</p><p>She gave a weak nod, letting her lips part open. The man was careful to place the straw back into her mouth.</p><p>"I guess I should probably introduce myself as well now... I am Dr. Spencer Reid and I work for the FBI's Behavioral Analysis Unit. We had been working on your case for a while."</p><p>Lydia carefully consumed all the new information being told to her. </p><p>To the older man's surprise, a small raspy whisper came from her lips. "C-Case?” To her, it seemed like Dr. Reid was talking about another person, he was telling the life story of another girl. </p><p>He let out a quiet sigh. “It’s not in your best interest to know what happened right now in your state. I promise you’ll get answers soon but you just have to be patient.” He was there when they found her, he helped carry her up the stairs from that hellish prison she had been trapped in. The red liquid had bled from the stab wounds across her body, staining his white button up. </p><p>He sat there with her as long as he could, trying to entertain the girl with fun facts and helping her drink the water. </p><p>“Do you like TV?” He asked, desperately trying to make small talk with Lydia to distract her from the pain meds that were beginning to wear off. </p><p>Her green eyes squinted, “I don’t think so.” The answer was curt and simple. Her eyelashes fluttered as she glanced up at Spencer. “Why can’t I remember?”</p><p>Her voice was rough and coarse. Reid watched her move her gaze across the hospital room, landing on the television for a few seconds before meeting his own. </p><p>The feeling in his chest was strange. He felt responsible for her and her wellbeing. He felt like he needed to be there with her every step of the way. He never thought like this with other victims that the BAU team helped. </p><p>He couldn’t leave her. </p><p>-</p><p>“FBI! Open up!” Hotch shouted from outside the front door of the seemingly abandoned house in Estes Park, Colorado. It had a brick exterior with leaves and weeds slithering up it. Some of the windows were blocked out and broken. The house sat high on the mountain above the small and usually quiet town. SWAT agents surrounded the house, waiting in anticipation to enter.</p><p>They had profiled Marvin Davenport as a kidnapper suffering from paranoid schizophrenia, nothing more. He had kidnapped his niece, Lydia, when she was sixteen from her family’s home in Ohio. The case had gone cold after about a year until someone had called in an anonymous tip three months ago. </p><p>That’s when the team got involved. </p><p>The armed group waited in front of the house for a few moments, yet there was silence.</p><p>With a hard kick, the door was knocked down. Everyone had guns drawn with flashlights in the other hand. The interior was old and worn, like it hadn’t been replaced since at least the 80s. A strong mildew smell came from the wallpaper that was plastered onto the decaying walls. There was a sickly-sweet odor that was immediately recognized, making the agents gag.</p><p>“Oh God, that’s awful.” Derek Morgan’s face scrunched up, trying to cover his nose in the corner of his elbow. </p><p>Hotch’s gaze moved through the nearly empty house before landing on the entrance to the living room. A torn up green sofa sat in the middle of the room and sitting on it was a decomposing body. </p><p>It was adorned in a rotting, pink polyester dress. A string of pearls delicately rested on the corpse’s chest and a knife stuck from the neck. </p><p>There was silence as they stared at the body. “It has to be at least a couple months old.” Spencer argued, “They must have done something, considering how it’s still so intact.”</p><p>“Once we’re done with this, I need someone over here to ID the body.” Hotch announced in response to the worried glances.</p><p>Suddenly, there was a clatter, coming from the lower level of the house. Each agent became more aware of the situation they stepped into, pulling their guns out in front of them. They paced through the house, trying to find any set of stairs leading down.</p><p>“Here!” One of the SWAT agents called, he stood in front of a water damaged bookcase. It was propped open ever so slightly, allowing the small amount of light from inside to shine into the dirty living room. They quickly pushed it open to reveal a room built from cement blocks with a staircase leading down. Another crash came from downstairs and a muffled scream.</p><p>"She's still alive." Morgan announced, hurrying down the creaky stairs. Everyone followed behind with guns drawn. </p><p>They arrived downstairs to see another open room, built with the same cement blocks. They shone their flashlights until they landed on a tall man, holding a younger girl in a chokehold against his chest. A knife was pressed against her throat. </p><p>Even in the terrifying situation she was in, the girl didn't appear scared. She seemed thankful that maybe, just maybe, her nightmare was going to come to an end. The heavy bags sat under her eyes with a dark purple tone that contrasted against her ghostly skin. From her body hung a pair of blue pajamas that were seemingly two sizes too big. Maybe they had fit at one point but now, she was skin and bones. The pajamas were covered with blood, seemingly fresh.</p><p>The man was mumbling before he noticed the agents approach him and his niece. "Marvin Davenport, put the knife down." Hotch demanded, his gun was pointed right at him.</p><p>"No! No! No!" He exclaimed, tightening his grip on her neck. Her feet began to weakly kick, signaling that she was beginning to lose air. "If I let her go, she'll die. Lydia can't take care of herself! She needs me! She needs me to protect her!" His eyes were crazed as he looked over the small crowd of agents. </p><p>"Lower your guns." Aaron mumbled, "Put them down."</p><p>Seconds after, Marvin removed the knife from her neck, only to push it into the side of her torso. A weak cry escaped Lydia's lips as he released her from his grasp, letting her fall onto the cold and hard floor. Her head hit the ground with a loud 'thunk' and a pool of blood began to gather on the blue, fleece fabric and leaked onto the flooring. She was out.</p><p>Spencer and JJ hurried to take her upstairs and outside, back to the ambulances. Lydia had become so malnourished that she was incredibly light and easy to pick up. The blonde woman rested her limp arm over her shoulder while Reid took the other one, the side with the knife. He was careful to not move it as they walked up the stairs. The red liquid coming from her body smeared onto his own shirt. </p><p>The rush to get her to the ambulance was terrifying.</p><p>It was a race against death itself.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Questions</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lydia had been in the hospital for almost a week, the doctors had been observing her injuries and trying to get her health back on the right track. It was apparent that in the basement, she had developed an untreated case of pneumonia that went straight to her lungs. Her breaths were always short and shallow compared to a normal person’s. They had been treating her with antibiotics and stronger medication to try and heal her lungs as much as possible.</p><p>“I’m surprised she didn’t die from it, untreated pneumonia leads to death in the majority of cases.” A nurse explains to Hotchner as they watch the girl from outside the viewing window. He stood in silence, not responding to the nurse as the doctor checked her stitches. They were all over her body, from the shallow cuts to the stab wound in her torso. </p><p>Spencer approached the window as well, standing next to Aaron. “Statistically, the thing that would have killed her first would have been the pneumonia. It seems like her uncle took care of her in his own sadistic way. When he hurt her, the injuries weren’t serious enough to need critical medical attention. When she was sick, maybe he gave her medication of some kind.” He paused and glanced between his supervisor and the nurse, “Just a thought.” </p><p>The door swung open and the doctor emerged, “She can be released as early as the end of the week.” He pulled off his gloves, tucking the blue latex into his pockets.  “Lydia will need to come back for occasional check ups.”</p><p>The two men nodded, showing their understanding before entering the hospital room. The girl’s limbs rested in a relaxed manner atop of the thin mattress. Her scarlet hair had been put into a long braid, curling behind her neck and resting on her shoulder. Through the collar of the hospital gown, her collarbones could be seen, sticking out like a sore thumb. Her emerald eyes moved between the pair that had entered her room. “Are you coming to ask more questions?” Her voice was raspy yet soft and gentle. </p><p>Hotch gave her a nod and a small smile, “I’m sure you’re getting tired of us.” The team, mostly Spencer and Hotch, had been in and out of her room, showing her pictures and interrogating her to try and help her remember anything she possibly could.</p><p>She shook her head before trying to sit up, only to cause her face to scrunch up. A gentle pair of hands were carefully placed on her right shoulder and beneath her left arm for support. She glanced over to see none other than Spencer Reid, his messy mop of caramel hair just barely covered his eyes when he looked down. A relief was felt when she finished moving, letting her body rest. “Thank you.” She mumbled, glancing over at the older man. </p><p>He shook his head in response, “It’s no problem.”</p><p>They had begun to grow closer. The team had figured out over the days of questioning that she was the most comfortable with him, presumably after that first day they shared when she first arrived. Spencer confessed that he enjoyed her company just as much as she enjoyed his. </p><p>-</p><p>Spencer held a photograph between his fingers, it was a family. A mom, dad, son, and daughter. “Do you recognize these people, Lydia?”</p><p>Her eyes squinted as she looked over the picture. There was a few seconds pause before she shook her head. “I don’t think so…” She turned her head toward the older man, “Who are they?”</p><p>This was the moment he had been dreading. The team had already discussed how to go about what happened to her family after she was taken. His heart began to beat harder, swallowing the lump in his throat. He didn’t know how she would react.</p><p>“I- Um…” He paused for a moment to compose himself. “This is your family.” Spencer waited a few moments to gage her reaction. She raised her eyebrows as she examined the photograph once again. There was a look in her eyes that he just couldn’t put his finger on. It was like her brain was trying to rummage through all of it’s filing cabinets for any information it could find. </p><p>“Family?” The look on her face softened.</p><p>Spencer cleared his throat, his finger landed on the woman in the photo first. “This is your mom, her name is Joyce.” The sentence came out cautiously, again, waiting for any reaction. When nothing came, he continued. “This is your dad, Daniel.” He pointed to the tall man and then to the younger boy. “This is your brother, Ben.” He paused, “And that’s you.” His finger pointed to the little girl in the picture, she looked to be about ten years old. Her fiery hair was pulled into two pigtails and a large grin sat on her face. </p><p>For a second, Spencer could have sworn he saw a spark in her eyes but that hope quickly went away when she shook her head. “They look very nice but I don’t think that’s me.”</p><p>A disappointed sigh escaped his lips. “That’s okay.” Before he could say anything more, he was interrupted. </p><p>“Can you tell me what happened? Now that I’m feeling better?” Lydia questioned. Spencer had made a deal with her days ago that if she was ready and not hopped up on as many pain killers that he would tell her about the case. The team figured it might be a good way to jog her memory. </p><p>He was hesitant but eventually nodded, "Are you sure?"</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>Reid adjusted his posture in the uncomfortable hospital chair that he had begun to spend a lot of his time in. "You were taken three years ago, when you were sixteen, by your uncle, Marvin." He thought for a second before making the decision to leave out a couple details. "He moved you around the country over the time that he had you in his possession. He was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia, he believed that he was doing the right thing by hurting you, keeping you to himself in basements of abandoned houses." He took a second to examine her expression before continuing. Her eyes rested on his face, watching as he told the story. Lydia seemed disconnected, like he was telling her about someone else's case. "We got an anonymous tip which led us here to Colorado. When we found you, he was holding you with a knife. We put our guns down to try and talk to him but he stabbed you. He dropped you on your head, between your injuries and how sick and malnourished you were, you had a pretty severe head injury. Now you're here..."</p><p>There was silence until the younger girl looked up at him. "Is that why I can't remember anything?" A piece of hair fell in front of her eyes and without thinking, Reid swept it back behind her ear. Immediately, he dropped his hand and an embarrassed blush spread across his cheeks. He glanced back at Lydia, her eyes were trying to focus on anything but Spencer in that moment. </p><p>_</p><p>"If she's getting discharged, where will she go?" JJ asked, crossing her arms over her chest. "She has no traceable family and you can't just send a nineteen year old with memory loss into the world." After what the doctor had said, Hotch pulled the two agents in an empty conference room. Everyone else had flown back to Quantico while they stayed to question Lydia.</p><p>"Our best option right now is sending her to a treatment center." The oldest man explained, leaning against the beige wall of the conference room. "Unless someone else has a better idea."</p><p>Spencer took a breath, "Don't you think that it would be best to ask her?" He couldn't imagine the poor girl being put in a treatment center. She would have to figure out life nearly on her own.  He remembers that moment when he was about her age, putting his mother into one. That look on her face and the hurt in her voice would forever be burned into his head. He would never be able to get away from that initial feeling of guilt he felt when they came to take her.</p><p>JJ shrugged, "That doesn't sound like a bad idea. She's over eighteen, she should be able to contribute to this conversation."</p><p>Hotch let out a sigh and motioned towards the door, "Be my guest."</p><p>The agents made their way back into her hospital room. She was propped up against her pillow as one of the nurses examined the stitches on her side. She was given minor surgery to make sure that the wound healed correctly. "I'm sorry, can we have a moment with Lydia?" JJ asked the nurse. The woman nodded, mentioning how she was just finishing cleaning the area around the stitches. </p><p>After the door closed, Aaron began his spiel on what Lydia's options were for the time being. "You aren't a minor so you do have some sort of choice in this." He began, "We can admit you to a treatment center for a while, you can receive full time care and help adjusting back to society. There is also the option of finding someone to house you. We cannot find any family in your records nor anyone close that would be willing."</p><p>The girl looked overwhelmed, pulling the blanket tighter over her body as she adjusted her blue gown. Her eyes widened at the presumed thought of going off alone into the world in her condition. "C-Can I have some time to think about it?"</p><p>He nodded, "Of course. We'll leave you alone now." He motioned for JJ and Spencer to follow him out the door. Before the youngest agent could turn and follow his older counterparts out the door, he feels a dainty hand grab his wrist. He looks down to see her pale and skinny fingers wrapped around his tanner hand. The motion came with a surprise, after spending hours with Lydia and profiling her as much as he could, he learned that she was a generally submissive person. Perhaps her brain had adopted that trait to keep herself safe during her time in captivity. He didn't think she would ever be one to pull any bold actions. </p><p>"Stay for a few minutes, please." Her soft eyes met his and he knew at that moment, he was wrapped around her finger. Reid nodded, pulling up his plastic chair next to her bed. They sat in uncomfortable silence for a few moments as the caramel haired man waited for the girl to say something, anything. Lydia had a look on her face, like she wanted to say something but it just wouldn't come out. Her hands gripped the blanket as she pulled herself up even farther onto the pillows that laid behind her. Her face began to make the same expression that it would whenever she was in pain. Reid was quick to stand up, hovering his hands over her shoulders. "I don't need you to help me." She huffed as she got comfortable. </p><p>"You're going to hurt yourself even more if you keep straining your body like that." Spencer argued as he sat back down.</p><p>She let out a small laugh, it was the first time he had ever heard it. "Last time I checked, I don't think you're a doctor."</p><p>The man smiled at her teasing nature. "I am in fact a doctor, I have three PHDs."</p><p>"But that doesn't count, you're not a medical doctor." She replied, surprised by his response.</p><p>"Fine, I'll admit that..." He paused, "Why did you ask me to stay? I can tell you have something to talk to me about, Lydia."</p><p>Her gaze fell to her lap as he finished his sentence. As she spoke, her voice became softer and more timid than how she sounded just seconds ago. "This'll sound stupid." His brow furrowed as he listened to her change in demeanor and words that fell from her now rosy lips. "He said that I n-need to find somewhere to stay or go to a treatment center..." She glanced back up at Spencer. Her heart was bursting from her chest as she spoke. For having such a high IQ, she didn't know how he hadn't figured out what she was implying. "Um, do you think that it would be okay if I was to... stay with you for a little while?"</p><p>The question came at Reid with a shock, he didn't know how he should respond to Lydia. He played the question over and over again in his head, different outcomes and scenarios ran through his head. Maybe it would just be a temporary thing until her memory came back and she was able to fend for herself. Maybe it would become long term. Maybe it just wouldn't work out at all and she would be sent to the treatment center in the end. "I-I don't know how to respond to that." He stuttered, his brain was running at a million miles an hour, "I think you should think it over more and make sure that you are making the correct decision. We should both think this over more. We barely even know each othe-"</p><p>She was quick to cut him off, "Please, Spencer." The way his name rolled off her tongue made the butterflies in his stomach go wild. "You're the closest thing I have to a friend." She didn't want him to feel like she was using his kindness towards her and all the time they had spent together as a weapon to manipulate him to agree to the arrangement. </p><p>He sighed, running his longer fingers through his messy hair. "I need you to think about it. I'll do the same." He stood from his chair, leaving the room without a smile nor a simple goodbye. The empty chair sat next to her bed, she watched him pace down the hallway back towards the waiting room. Lydia looked down at her lap, letting her fingers grab handfuls of the blanket that laid over her body. She could feel the back of her throat grow thick and her eyes began to sting. She had been overwhelmed the past week with all the questions, tests, and surgeries. She hadn't cried, not once, since she had woken up from her coma but now the gates had been opened. </p><p>Little to her knowledge, Spencer hurried outside to the black car parked in the lot. Hotch and JJ had left minutes ago back to the hotel, getting packed and ready to leave tomorrow morning. He pulled his phone out of his back pocket and put it up to his ear as it rang.</p><p>"Hotch." The older man answered on the other side, "What's going on?"</p><p>"She told me she wants to stay with me." Reid explained, staring out into the parking lot. "She said that I was the closest thing she has to a friend and that she wants to live with me instead of going to a treatment center."</p><p>There was silence on the line before he finally spoke, "What do you think?"</p><p>"I don't know, Hotch. I don't want her to get sent away but I don't know if this will be good for either of us. I would be taking care of one of our victims. Doesn't that sound a little inappropriate?" He rambled. "I really don't know what to do here."</p><p>"Think on it, Reid. You still have the rest of the day."</p><p>He only had mere hours to make a decision that would change both of their lives for better or for worse.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Home</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Lydia, sweetheart.” One of the nurses entered the hospital room, “The doctor has discharged you, someone is here to pick you up.” The woman’s gentle voice flowed through the room as she came over to help the young girl detach from all the medical machinery stuck in her arms.</p><p>Her face was overcome with a warm, pink flush as Spencer Reid walked inside. “You came.” Her voice was small and quiet as he crossed his arms. A tiny grin appeared on his face as he nodded. The look she gave him when she saw him warmed his heart. </p><p>“You thought I wouldn’t?”</p><p>She shrugged as the nurse finished, “You sounded pretty unsure yesterday.” She sounded as if she was surprised that he thought about it and saw more positives than negatives about the situation. He was about to let a nineteen year old with amnesia live in his home, both were nearly total strangers. </p><p>The nurse had left the room seconds ago after bandaging the spots that the IVs were pulled from as well as rewrapping her wound on her torso. “I still am.” Spencer told her, truthfully. “I do think that this will be good for both of us though.” He explained, watching as she stood from the bed. The older man was quick to come to her rescue as her legs trembled and almost collapsed. “Careful, I’ve been here for less than a minute and I’ve already had to come and save you.” He mumbled in a teasing manner.</p><p>Lydia scoffed as she grabbed a hold of his shoulders, this was the first time she had stood next to him. Whenever the BAU and Spencer came to visit and question her, she remained in bed. He was only a couple inches taller than her. Standing, she could comfortably rest her head on his shoulder. “You agreed to this.”</p><p>His big brown eyes looked down into hers like they had done many other times. His grip on her shoulders loosened but was still firm. They both stood there for a few seconds in comfortable silence. For a moment it was like they were the only two people in the world. </p><p>Spencer’s thoughts came back to him moments later, he cleared his throat and helped her sit on the bed. Her legs dangled off the edge, he took a second to examine them. The pale skin was covered with short, white scars and almost healed, yellowing bruises. She must have caught him staring because she quickly covered the pale limbs with the blanket that hung off the other side of the bed. He looked away after realizing his mistake, mumbling a silent apology. He pulled a bag from the chair that she hadn't noticed before, he must have put it there before she saw him. "JJ is letting you borrow something until we can go shopping later." He took a breath, "And um, the hospital is able to supply your undergarments."</p><p>The word made a large smile appear on Lydia's face before letting out a laugh. "Undergarments? C'mon, you sound fifty." He mentally cursed himself for the awkward use of the word. "But thank you. I really appreciate it." He gave a tiny grin and nodded, handing off the plastic bag of fabric to her. </p><p>"You're welcome." He stood next to the door frame, oblivious to any sort of cue that Lydia was trying to give him.</p><p>She cleared her throat as she opened the crinkled bag, "Can you leave or at least turn around for a few seconds... so I can change?"</p><p>A deep scarlet blush appeared on his face as he walked back through the door, "Damn it." He mumbled after hitting his shoulder on the trim in his clumsy escape. </p><p>Lydia let a giggle fall from her lips as she carefully slipped the nightgown off, thankful that the blinds on the viewing window had already been closed. She pulled on the cotton underwear and thin, unlined bra that the hospital provided as well as JJ's sweater and sweatpants that hung off her body. With a quiet huff, she slipped on the slippers that the hospital had given her. Pulling herself off the bed, she stumbled to the door to let Spencer back in. The quick movement had startled him, making the FBI agent jump.</p><p>He looked the girl up and down. She looked so normal now that she wasn't in anything blood stained or a hospital gown. Her hair was in a fresh braid from the last time he had seen her. Her hair was shiny so he assumed that she had showered. "Are you ready to go? Do you need anything else?"</p><p>She nodded, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. "I'm ready." The doctor had provided her with extra pain medication and bandages to keep her wound protected while she travelled. She grasped the baggie between her fingers as Reid scanned the room one last time. He tilted his head towards the door, motioning for Lydia to leave. </p><p>The young girl slowly made her way out of the hospital room with Spencer following behind her, making sure that she didn't fall over again. Her arms were crossed over her chest as the front doors to the hospital automatically opened, leading the pair out to the parking lot. "It's the black SUV." Spencer said, pointing to the car at the end of the parking lot. He increased his pace so he was walking beside her. Lydia nodded, chewing on the corner of her bottom lip as they approached the car. He was quick to unlock it and help her inside. Intertwining his fingers with hers, he helped her keep balance as she lifted herself into the leather seats. </p><p>The simple motion gave her butterflies in her stomach, his tight grip held onto her own as she got into the car. She refused to say anything, she even felt bad thinking about it. Lydia felt as if her hand molded perfectly into his. HIs gentle touch made her heart flutter. It didn't take a lot of work to figure out that Spencer Reid was a complete puppy. His eyes would soften whenever she spoke, his heart would start beating whenever she giggled, and he loved holding her hand. </p><p>Spencer shut the car door and got in on the driver's side. He pulled his hand over the black fabric strap and pushed it into the buckle until it made the 'click; he was looking for. Lydia soon did the same. "Are you ready?" He looked over at her with his hands at ten and two on the steering wheel. </p><p>She nodded, folding her hands into her lap. "Yeah, sure."</p><p>"That didn't sound very confident." Reid pointed out as he started the engine. He was beginning to think that he had incorrectly profiled the girl. The more she came out of her shell and the less drugs she was on, she became a very bold and playful personality, unlike what Spencer had previously believed. He figured that anyone could fall into that submissive state when their life is in danger. </p><p>He knew he did. </p><p>She gave a teasing scoff, crossing her arms over her chest. "Oh really? I think I sounded very confident." </p><p>Spencer smiled as he pulled out of the parking lot, "I would have to argue against that, Lydia." He stopped the car, waiting for traffic to pass by, "Speak now or forever hold your peace." The girl leaned back into her seat with a soft smile on her face as she waited for him to start driving again. "If you say so..." He playfully mutters, pulling onto the highway towards the airport. </p><p>The drive was long. Spencer had to make sure to leave extra early so he wouldn't hold back Hotch and JJ. There was minimal traffic as he drove down the highway towards the nearest airport. Not even ten minutes later, Lydia had fallen asleep. Her body curled into a fetal position in the leather seat. She let out soft breaths as she slept. She held herself in her arms, tucking her legs into the small space between her forearms and chest. He liked when she looked like that, at peace. </p><p>The ride to the airport was more bearable than Spencer had assumed it would be. He parked the car near the whirring jet on the tar. The older man reached over and placed his hand on Lydia's shoulder, "We're here." His voice was quiet enough not to startle her.</p><p>A quiet groan came from her lips as her eyes slowly opened, "You woke me up." There was a small pout on her face, letting her body unfold and sit up. </p><p>"Obviously," He began, pulling his hand back to his side as he pulled the keys out of the car. "We have to get on the plane. Hotch and JJ are already there, I don't want to be late."</p><p>The young girl sighed as she unbuckled her seatbelt, unmistakably exhausted and happy to be out of the hospital. The pair got out of the car and began to make their way towards the jet. The small steps were steep, climbing them to enter the plane. She held the guard rail tight as they entered the plane. Just like Spencer said, the two older agents were already on the plane, presumably waiting for them to show up.</p><p>"Lydia!" JJ gave her a small smile as she stood to greet the nineteen year old. "How are you doing?" She asked after approaching her, crossing her arms over her chest. </p><p>Her demeanor became quiet, "I'm okay." It was strange for Spencer to see the way in which she carried herself change in the blink of an eye. Had she really become that comfortable around him? That thought ran through his mind, allowing him to space out as the two women carried on small talk. Her trance quickly broke as she led Lydia to sit down on the couch that was toward the back of the plane. Hotch observed her as she sat down, folding her hands in her lap. </p><p>The youngest agent quietly made his way over to the girl and sat down next to her. "Um, do you want a blanket or anything? I'm assuming that you'll go back to sleep." The small gesture made a tired smile appear on her face. </p><p>"If it wouldn't be too much trouble..." Reid nodded before lifting open one of the cabinets near the plane window, pulling out a fleece blanket. </p><p>He handed the fabric to her as she laid down, mumbling a quiet "thank you" before closing her eyes.</p><p>The caramel haired man stood there for a second before turning back towards the chairs that Hotch and JJ sat in. The two had sat in silence, watching the exchange. He hesitantly moved towards the pair, sitting down across from them. </p><p>"She smiles when she talks to you." His supervisor pointed out, creating a confused look on Reid's face.</p><p>"O-Of course she does." He was never one for being interrogated about his personal life, especially by his coworkers. </p><p>JJ sat up in her seat to look over at Lydia, making sure she was asleep before speaking. "Have you seen how she is with everyone else?</p><p>"She's just shy. I mean, out of everyone, I've spent the most time with her since she has woken up." He argued, becoming more defensive of their simple and friendly relationship. </p><p>There was a silence as the plane took off. </p><p>"Are you sure you're even making the right decision, Spence?" The blonde woman paused to collect her thoughts. "It seems like you rushed into this. She needs someone that can be there full time, you'll be off on cases. She needs normalcy and steadiness right now." Her argument was valid. Even Spencer wasn't sure if he was making the right decision. He didn't have enough time to fully think it over. What if something were to happen to her while he was on a case, where would she even go if he was on a case. He didn't want their relationship dynamic to become strained, like he was her full time caretaker. </p><p>He let out a sigh, glancing out the window at the clouds surrounding them. "I don't know. I want to believe that I'm making a good choice." Now that everything was happening, he had never been so uncertain about something. He was Spencer Reid, he was a genius. He felt like he should know all the right turns to take in life.</p><p>"I think what you'll be doing is helping her out in the long run, Spencer." Hotch remarked, holding eye contact with the young agent. "She needed someone and you were there. Lydia has nobody, no family. She is trusting you and putting her life in your hands." He has always had a way with words. If anyone could convince someone of something, it was Aaron. "You're the person that she trusts right now, don't screw it up."</p><p>Maybe he was right. </p><p>He didn't have a statistic for his current situation. How many FBI agents let a victim with amnesia live with them?</p><p>There were a few minutes of silence until JJ received a phone call. "Garcia?" She listened for a few seconds to her friend and coworker's voice, her eyes began to scan the plane. She looked focused. "How many tapes have you guys gotten through? There was a whole box-" Another pause, "I can't imagine... We're on our way back to Quantico, I can help look through them so you can take a break. It sounds like you need it, Pen." The woman listened to another question before a small smile appeared on her face, "Um, funny story. Lydia Davenport is actually on the plane with us... No, no. I would rather let Reid explain it to you when we get back, should only be another two hours or so." She let out a giggle, "See you soon... Alright... Got it... Alright... Bye."</p><p>JJ placed the phone back into her pocket, "Seems like you've got some explaining to do when we get back, Spencer." An entertained smile sat across her lips.  </p><p>"Not cool." He sunk back into his seat with his arms crossed. The words were meant as a joke but he couldn't help but feel like everyone already knew. He was sure Garcia wouldn't be able to help but babble about Spencer Reid's new roommate. </p><p>The rest of the plane ride went by fairly quickly, Hotch was filling out paperwork, JJ was reading her new book that she had been going on about buying since last month, and Lydia was still asleep, thankfully. This left Reid alone with his own thoughts.</p><p>After the talk they had, he had become paranoid that he made the wrong call by letting the auburn haired girl stay with him. Would others think it was inappropriate or unnecessary? Would they think there was a relationship there that, in all actuality, wasn't? He had to remind himself that this was temporary, this was just an act of kindness towards her, nothing more. It would never be anything more. </p><p>There in that moment, on the plane, he made the decision that he would keep his distance from Lydia Davenport indefinitely. </p><p>Not long after, the plane finally came to a stop at the airport runway. The sudden jolt awoke the nineteen year old. Her braid had become loose and the sweatpants had ridden up her calves. In an embarrassed manner, she quickly sat up and looked around the plane, trying to find Reid. There was a sudden flush of relief when she saw him, his messy hair was swept across his forehead. He offered her a tight lipped smile as soon as he saw that she was awake. He got up and his legs carried him over to the couch, sitting down beside her. </p><p>"How'd you sleep?"</p><p>"Okay, I don't think I've slept well in a while." She replied truthfully.</p><p>He gave her a nod before holding out his hand for her to take. "Hotch decided to give me the weekend off." Lydia nodded before looking around the plane to see it was empty. "And um, JJ is letting you keep the clothes until you get some of your own."</p><p>"That's nice of her." She mumbled, her green eyes lazily looked into her lap before looking back at Spencer. </p><p>He nodded once again before taking her hand, leading her off the plane.</p><p>There wasn't much talking as Reid drove the girl and himself to his apartment. Silent glances were exchanged as Lydia switched her gaze between the windshield and the passenger side windows, presumably taking in the town around them. It wasn't so much of an awkward silence as it was unintentional. They just had nothing to say to each other, especially Spencer. He wanted to keep within the new boundaries that he set for himself.</p><p>The drive was only about ten minutes from the airport to his apartment. His home was cozy and quite quaint. Normally, it was just him and his books that resided there. That had definitely changed. Lydia took a couple seconds to observe her surroundings, noticing how many books he did have. Each classic, paperback, and new book that had not yet been touched. They were meticulously placed on the shelves and empty spaces on his coffee table near his couch.  "There's a lot."</p><p>He hummed in response. "I like to read." She nodded before crossing her arms over her chest. There was an awkward silence for a few seconds until Spencer interjected. "Um, let me show you where you can stay." He began to walk, allowing her to follow him down the narrow hallway. He points to the closed door next to the room they were just about to enter. "That's my room. Bathroom is right across from it." She glanced at the second door and nodded. The pair entered her new room. It was extremely simple with light flooring and white walls. A full sized bed stood near the window, adorned with a white quilt and matching pillow cases. A wooden nightstand stood next to it with the closet adjacent. "It's the guest bedroom." He explained, trying to disrupt the reoccurring silence. "I hope it's oka-"</p><p>"It's great." She replied in a rushed manner, not wanting him to think that she was ungrateful. "Thank you. I really mean it."</p><p>He gave her another tight lipped smile and a nod, "Of course... Are you hungry?"</p><p>She politely shook her head, "I'm okay, but thank you."</p><p>The pair once again sit in a pool of uncomfortable silence, trying not to look at each other. Both of their eyes travel around the room, out the window, etc. Anything to not look at each other. He quickly places the bag of medication given to her by the doctor on top of the nightstand, he had been holding it the whole plane ride. "I need to go work on some papers in the living room but let me know if you need anything." He quickly added before walking back into the hallway, leaving Lydia alone in the guest room. </p><p>This was going to be harder than he thought.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Nightmares</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>She slept with her door open that night. </p><p>It was purely accidental. After Spencer had left her alone in the guest room, she went straight to bed. The vaguely familiar feeling of sleeping on a real and clean bed was comforting. Lydia pulled the heavy, white comforter up over her legs and torso. It engulfed her body as she rested her head against the pillow cases. After taking a deep breath, she let her eyes flutter closed. </p><p>For the first few hours of the night, her sleep was quiet and undisturbed until she heard some faint groaning sounds coming from the other side of the wall. The ginger haired girl quickly became wide awake as the noises began to sound more pained. A frown sat on her face as she ruffled the comforter that was draped over her body, letting her legs dangle off the side as she listened for the noise again. </p><p>And there it was. This time, quiet words came along with it. </p><p>Lydia sucked in a breath as she mustered up the courage to walk into the room next door. Her feet pattered softly against the cold, hardwood floor. The bottom of her lip found its way between her teeth as she stopped in front of his door. Spencer was mumbling soft pleas and cries of help as he turned and thrashed in his bed. The soft light that flooded from the hallway made the sweat on his face glimmer. "No, no please." His voice trembled and his face scrunched up like someone had just hit him. </p><p>She didn't know what to do. </p><p>The girl stood in the doorway for a few more seconds before deciding to slowly approach the sleeping man. As she got closer, her feet became tangled in a cord near his bed. A yelp escaped her rosy lips as her limbs fumbled over the black piece of electric wiring, causing Spencer to jolt upwards in a cold sweat. His chest was moving up and down as he caught his breath. It was like he was being suffocated. Before he could slow his breath, his eyes widened at the sight in front of him. Lydia was frozen in the space inches away from his footboard.</p><p>"W-What are you doing in here?" He was more confused than frightened from his bad dream after seeing her. </p><p>A blush covered her face, although it was difficult to see in the darkness. It was just her silhouette, the light came from behind her body in the hall. "I-I'm sorry. Its just that I heard you from my room and I thought I should come check on you."</p><p>Spencer's face softened as he shook his head. "It's alright, Lydia. You didn't have to, I was bound to wake up eventually." He paused, "It was just a dream." The quiet mumble sounded as if it was meant for himself rather than the girl standing in front of him. There was a blaring silence as the pair tried to make the current situation less awkward.</p><p>"Uh, can I ask what it was about?" She questioned, crossing her arms over her chest. The sweatpants and sweater hung off of her slim body, a little more disheveled after her few hours of deep sleep.</p><p>He squinted his eyes in confusion for a few seconds before chewing on his bottom lip. "It's not important..." Without warning, Lydia sat beside his long legs that took their place beneath his blanket. She watched his expression change.  His eyes widened and he pulled himself upwards, straightening out his poor posture. She sat with him in the same fashion that he would sit with her at the hospital. The small and, what she thought wasn't completely obvious, gesture made his heart flutter.</p><p>"It must have been pretty important." She quietly argued, glancing down at her lap and back up to the man. Her hand subconsciously reached for his forehead, making Spencer flinch in the process. Her pale fingers ran across his sweaty forehead and threaded through his messy, caramel hair in soft and gentle motions. Her touch came as a surprise to the doctor. His eyes followed hers as she tried her best to examine his face. Seconds after she realized what she was doing, Lydia pulled her hand away and mumbled a small "I'm sorry."</p><p>Spencer was nearly speechless as she pulled her hand back into her lap. The more time they spent together, the more enamored by her he became. "No- I mean, that's alright." He quickly began to ramble. "I just wasn't really expecting that and I don't know. You just didn't seem very bold when I first met you but you were all drugged up and not right at first and there were just so many variables. Actually, speaking of variables, did you know that confounding variables can ruin an experiment, after all that work you just produce a useless result. I mean that's pretty basic knowledge but-" </p><p>"Spencer." She was hesitant to cut him off. "Are you sure you're alright?"</p><p>He sucked in a breath of air and nodded, quite quickly. "Yeah, yeah. I'm fine. Lydia wasn't quite sure if he was lying or not, maybe if she knew him better she could tell his ticks. The response made her nod, a tight smile appeared on her lips as she stood up and just before she could take a step, he stopped her. "I'm sorry but can you stay?" His voice had a smidge of desperateness in it as he pulled the blanket up tighter over his clothed torso. </p><p>The request was shocking to the auburn haired girl. He had been acting distant ever since she had asked to live with him for the time being in the hospital. His eyes moved across her face, waiting for any kind of non verbal or verbal response. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion and she pulled her bottom lip back ever so slightly with her two front teeth. Lydia didn't tell him but her stomach was filled with butterflies, seeing him watch her with his chocolate, puppy dog eyes. It was like he was silently begging her to say yes. After a few more moments of silence, she reluctantly agreed.</p><p>To Spencer's delight, he pulled back the comforter on the other, empty side of his mattress. "Here..." He motioned to the open space, allowing her to climb in. Clumsily, she made it into the bed, resting her head on the empty pillow and letting her body face him. She was overwhelmed with the scent of his mahogany scented cologne and musk that left its stain on his gray, cotton sheets.</p><p>The pair laid there for a while. Their eyes never fully met, eventually one of them would become embarrassed and look away. Not once did their limbs touch but it was like they needed to be next to each other. They were like magnets. "Thank you for staying." Spencer whispered in a gentle tone, letting his eyes graze over her features in the darkness. </p><p>She simply nodded before letting out a yawn. "Mhm. Goodnight, Spencer."</p><p>-</p><p>The sunshine crept through the blinds the next morning, eventually waking the two up.</p><p>First was Lydia. The back of her hands met her tired eyelids, rubbing them as she sat up. As she opened her eyes, a bewildered look made its way onto her face. She was in Spencer's bed. How did she get into Spencer's bed. Suddenly, the memories all came flooding back through her morning haziness. The girl remembered him waking up from the nightmare and his request for her to stay with him. </p><p>Finally, after minutes of contemplation, she found the courage to wake up the sleeping man beside her. "Spencer." Her raspy voice came in a quiet whisper as she gently shook his shoulder. "Doctor Reid..."</p><p>"Hmm?" The soft hum escaped his lips as he flipped around to face Lydia, still half asleep. Yet, as soon as the realization hit him, he was wide awake. "Oh my God." The statement came from a place of total surprise, like he had completely forgotten the events that occurred just hours earlier. "Lydia, I'm sorry..." He began as he sat up. He still looked exhausted, like he didn't sleep for the rest of the night. "This is completely inappropriate." He stood from the bed, revealing his plain navy blue t-shirt and gray, plaid pajama pants. He shuffled around before grabbing his glasses from the nightstand next to the bed. </p><p>Before he could say anything else, the ginger haired girl was quick to interrupt him. "I didn't know you wore glasses."</p><p>"Contacts." He curtly replied before leaving his bedroom, leaving Lydia to follow him in a rush. </p><p>She huffed, pulling herself up from the bed to follow him out into his cozy living room. "You can't just walk off like that." </p><p>Spencer stayed silent, crossing his arms and staring at the floor before parting his pale lips. "You don't get it, Lydia. I'm supposed to be taking care of you. Nothing can come out of this."</p><p>"Nothing is coming out of this!" She has never been more frustrated, at least from what she can remember. "You were having a bad dream and I came in to check on you. You were the one that asked me to stay." She paused, "It must have been bad if you needed someone to sleep with you like I am your mom." As soon as she said it, she felt awful. </p><p>The man froze, keeping his eyes now set on the couch in the middle of the room. "Not cool, Lydia." He looked up at her, finally meeting her emerald eyes. "Not cool." He was quick to storm off into his bedroom, shutting the door and locking it behind him, like an angsty teenager. </p><p>She sucked in a breath and made her way into the guest room. Throwing her figure onto the bed, she spotted something sitting on her nightstand. It was the picture that Spencer had shown her in the hospital. The one with the mother, father, son, and little girl with bright red pigtails. Lydia sat up and grabbed the picture, holding it between her fingertips to examine the family in hopes of jogging her memory. </p><p>It had been minutes of staring at that picture and nothing. Not a single thing came to mind. </p><p>It was almost as if this was a different family with a different life. They all had different names, different hobbies, even different favorite colors than her family might have had. It hurt to look at. There was this perfectly happy family out there, supposedly waiting for her and she doesn't remember them. The more she thought about it, the more her heart began to ache at the thoughts that escaped her injured mind. She felt a warm tear fall down her cheek as she placed the picture back on the nightstand.</p><p>Lydia took a gentle breath, laying her head back onto the pillows and let rogue tears cascade down her rosy and freckled cheeks. She laid in bed and stared at the ceiling for minutes on end, it felt like an eternity to her before Reid came in. He was cautious in doing so, resting his hands on the trim of the doorway and using his tanned fist to knock on the white wood. "Hey." His voice was soft and vulnerable. </p><p>"Hi." She was quick to wipe the liquid on her face but didn't bother to look over at him. Their worsening silence became awkward fast. Spencer continued to stand in the doorway. His posture was tenser than it usually was and he soon shoved his hands into the pockets of his dress pants. He must have gotten dressed while she was laying there. </p><p>"I'm sorry for running off like that." He mumbled, glancing back and forth between the window of the guest room and the girl lying in the bed. Her hair was splayed across the pillow and bed as she rolled onto her side to look at him.</p><p>"It's alright..." Lydia wasn't sure of what to say. </p><p>Spencer motioned to the side of the bed where her legs rested, making a motion with his hand to ask 'Can I sit there?' She nodded in response, pulling her legs up to her chest to allow him more room. "Look, I promise that I'll answer any questions you have about me but not until I think you're improving. Okay?"</p><p>"Why do I have to wait? I know nothing about you and your life."</p><p>"You know I work for the FBI." He argued, quick to jump in.</p><p>She huffed in frustration, "I know that. I mean personal life and stuff, you know? Like what your dream was about..."</p><p>He sighed and pushed his fingers through his hair. "I told you. Not until you've gotten better-"</p><p>"What does it matter? Do you really think I'll get my memory back?"</p><p>"That's what we're hoping for, yes."</p><p>"This is stupid."</p><p>"I could really care less about what you think."</p><p>"Really? You made me sleep in your bed with you last night."</p><p>His breath hitched, she must have struck a nerve. "Look, last night was a moment of weakness for myself. It didn't mean whatever you think it does, Lydia."</p><p>She was quiet before she sat up, "Tell me what your dream was about."</p><p>"No, I won't."</p><p>"Is it really that personal? Was it your teeth falling out? Or maybe a giant spider was chasing you down the street." </p><p>Spencer had enough from her. "We're going to the mall in ten minutes, be ready." His exit was abrupt and serious. </p><p>He closed the door behind him, not with a slam but it sure wasn't gentle. </p><p>-</p><p>The silence had been blaring in the car as they drove to the nearest mall from the apartment. It seems like hush had been popular between the pair since Lydia had moved in. Between her snarky comments that Lydia had made earlier during their talk and the way Spencer ignored her and distanced himself, neither of them were sure that this would work out in their favor. </p><p>Finally, after miles of driving, they arrived at the mall. Spencer parked his car and the pair got out. He walked ahead of her, partly to guide her and because he didn't feel like making conversation at that point. </p><p>The shopping center was packed that day. Families weaved in and out of stores, people sat in the food court, screaming kids could be heard from the arcade just feet away. Lydia was quickly overwhelmed. She hadn't been around this many people in years. Her chest quickly felt heavy as she followed the older man through the crowds. She felt jittery, trying to shove her hands inside her pockets to make the feeling go away. Her ears rang with the sounds of people talking, footsteps beating down on the hard linoleum, and beeping noises from the arcade. Her head felt like it was about to explode. Her senses couldn't take in all the new things around her. "Spencer." Asking him for help was the last thing she wanted to do at this point, especially after their arguments. He was quick to turn to see the girl. It was evident that she was breathing harder than normal and her wandering, wide eyes made it quite obvious. </p><p>"Are you alright?" He asked out of genuine concern, examining her new body language. </p><p>She nodded, taking a shaky breath. "I think I just need a minute."</p><p>He placed his hand on the small of her back, leading her to the side of the mall's walkway. Her heart felt like it was pounding out of her chest as Spencer watched. He placed his hand on her shoulder, trying to be as comforting as possible. "Just breathe, Lydia." He took a breath himself, "I'm really sorry. I should have expected this reaction. I mean, people who have been isolated need to take time to ease into things again, like a lot of different things. You know? It's actually quite interesting." The younger girl squeezed her eyes shut as she rested her head back against the white wall. The sound of his rambling was somewhat comforting in a way. She had gotten so used to hearing him go on and on about any topic that had a file in his brain, she began to appreciate his spew of fun facts, no matter how boring and depressing they could be.</p><p>After a few moments, she was able to calm herself before anything full blown was to happen. She wiped her teary eyes with the back of her pale fist. The messy haired man watched cautiously as she regrouped, pulling her shoulders back and giving him a weak smile. "I'm okay."  Her soft voice floated into his ears as she tucked a piece of fiery hair behind her own. "Can we start getting my things? I wouldn't really prefer to stay longer than we need to." A giggle fell from her lips making a tiny smile appear on Spencer's face. </p><p>The trip was quite short in all actuality. They managed to get Lydia a handful of outfits and other necessities while the older man did some mild complaining but it was nothing that Lydia couldn't deal with. The majority was the pair bickering over which direction they should go in next and what kind of shampoo and conditioner she should buy. It was nice to have some quality time together where they were able to focus on something else rather than their present and, less known about, future problems.</p>
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<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Memory</h2></a>
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    <p>"No, I can assure you it is fine, Spencer. I think it would be good to get her comfortable with the rest of the team." Hotch explained over the phone. He had called Reid out of nowhere that morning to discuss his idea of bringing Lydia into the office to meet the rest of the team properly. She would be able to get more comfortable with everyone, helping her adjust back into society. </p><p>Spencer sighed, placing his flip phone onto his shoulder and letting his head rest atop of the piece of technology to hold it in place as he pulled a box of teabags out of one of the cabinets in his kitchen. "Are you sure? Even yesterday, she nearly had a panic attack walking around the mall."</p><p>"She already knows JJ and I, you will be there." He paused, faint mumbling could be heard from him. Someone else must have needed to talk to him. "Ask her and call me back to tell me what time you're coming. I’ll talk to you later.” Their conversation had come to an abrupt stop, making Spencer’s brow furrow. </p><p>A gentle knock disrupted his train of thought. The petite girl came into view. Her ginger hair was pulled into a loose ponytail, resting at the bottom of her head. “Is everything alright?” Her eyes scanned over his face which still held the same expression as it did seconds ago.</p><p>“Yeah, yeah…” He paused, running through every possible way he could ask her the question. “Hotch just called. You met him before at the hospital.” Spencer cleared his throat. “He wants you to come into the office, properly meet the rest of the team. Would you be okay with that?”</p><p>The messy haired man waited patiently for a response. Her eyelashes fluttered as she processed the words that fell from his lips. “Um, sure. When?” Her blunt tone made him worried. </p><p>“Really?”</p><p>“I mean it, Spencer.” Her tone quickly became warmer, realizing Spencer might not have been able to read her as well as she had thought. </p><p>-</p><p>Lydia held the grocery bag full of JJ’s clothes in her left hand. Reid walked beside her on her right as they entered the Bureau. Luckily, the blond woman was the first they bumped into.</p><p>“Oh my gosh! What are you guys doing here?” She was surprised to say the least. </p><p>Spencer cleared his throat before shoving his hands into his pockets. “Hotch wanted me to introduce Lydia to the rest of the team, since she’s living with me I guess.”</p><p>JJ nodded, throwing a kind smile to the younger girl. “It’s great seeing you again.”</p><p>“You too,” She forced the bag forward towards the other woman. “Thank you for letting me borrow these, I really do appreciate it.”</p><p>“Absolutely, it was nothing, Lydia. I’m glad you're starting to settle.” She made a subtle acknowledgement toward her new clothes. Her body was adorned with an oversized, striped sweater and a pair of dark blue jeans. The neutral tones of the sweater managed to complement the deep shade of her hair. </p><p>Spencer watched their interaction, making a tiny smile appear on his face. The sweet words exchanged between the women made his heart flutter ever so slightly. Truthfully, he was happy that the girl was doing so well. Her body language looked open around JJ. She kept her arms to her sides, not crossing them over her chest defensively. She looked to be actively involved in the conversation, she was enjoying talking to someone other than Spencer.</p><p>Eventually, the trio made their way farther into the office near the bull pen, where the other agents sat patiently waiting. Their attention turned from whatever conversation they were having to JJ as she began to speak.  "This is Lydia."</p><p>Hotch approached her, cautiously shaking her hand. "I'm happy to see that you're doing well. I'm sure Dr. Reid has been doing a great job helping you to adjust."  His gaze switched between the girl standing in front of him and the man a few feet away. </p><p>She nodded, letting her eyes wander the office. She wasn't a huge fan of eye contact for some reason, especially with someone as intimidating as Aaron Hotchner. "He is. I'm really grateful that he's allowing me to stay with him for the time being." Lydia glanced back over her shoulder to see Spencer clutching his messenger bag, a faint smile sat on his face. "I also wanted to thank you all for helping with my case. I, um, I don't remember any of it, just what Spencer has told me. It really wasn't a lot of information since he wants to wait until I have more of my memory back." She paused for a few seconds after realizing she was rambling, trying to get her thoughts together. "I just wanted to say thank you."</p><p>"Of course, Lydia. It's our job." Aaron lets out a quiet chuckle, this was probably the first time she had ever seen a smile on his face. "I know you've already met some of us but this is the rest of our team." He motions to the group near the desks. "Derek Morgan, Emily Prentiss, David Rossi, and Penelope Garcia." The four give her kind smiles and soft greetings. </p><p>"Do you know how long it will take for your memory to come back?" The dark haired woman asked. She didn't seem to come off as rude, it was a genuine question that nobody seemed to have the answer to. </p><p>The tanned man standing next to her nudged her with his elbow. He looked to be the oldest member of the team. There was an awkward silence before soft words fell from her rosy lips, "It's alright." She glanced back at Spencer before moving her gaze towards Emily. "Um, we're not sure."</p><p>"I've tried to keep a routine, I've been sharing information with her in small amounts, that sort of thing. There isn't a definite treatment for retrograde amnesia but I think these will slowly begin to help." Spencer explained confidentially. He pushed his hands deep into his pockets as he spoke, continuing to spew information and facts about amnesia and treatment methods. "The most commonly affected areas of the brain are the hippocampus, the diencephalon, and the temporal lobes. These are associated with episodic and declarative memory."</p><p>"Reid, I don't mean to sound like an ass but this is very out of character for you." Derek took a breath, trying to collect the words he wanted to say. "You haven't been able to come in because you decided to let a victim live with you?" His brown eyes travel between Spencer and Lydia, both standing awkwardly a few feet away from each other. </p><p>"I'm sorry, Spence. I agree. This isn't a very 'boy genius' thing of you to do." Penelope argued in agreement before turning to Lydia, "I'm sure you're lovely."</p><p>Before anyone else could say something, Hotch interrupted the conversation. "Okay, okay. No more questions."</p><p>"I just didn't want her to end up in a treatment center." His voice was soft, he stood closer to the girl than he did before. He pressed his lips together in a thin line, offering his team a curt smile. "Is there something wrong with that?"</p><p>"There's absolutely nothing wrong with that." Derek answered in response. "I'm sure Lydia is very grateful for your actions." He glanced towards her, running his eyes up and down her figure like he was trying to get a read on her. </p><p>Lydia nodded in agreement, looking over at Reid, who gave her his most genuine smile today. Even if it was just a small one.</p><p>"Keep us updated on how everything goes, if you don't mind." Rossi replied, tucking his hands into the pockets of his dress pants. "If she remembers anything important, call one of us so we can bring her in."</p><p>"I'll let you know." He promised before placing his hand on her shoulder, turning his attention to the girl that the team couldn't stop talking about. "Ready to go?"</p><p>Her cheeks became tinged with red as she sucked in a breath, nodding. "Yeah." His gentle touch lit her aflame, it was strange and comforting. It was something she didn't remember ever feeling. Her eyes lingered on him before quickly turning away. The bridge of his nose was littered with nearly translucent freckles. Pieces of his hair were tucked behind his ears, maybe he was growing it out. As her gaze moved across the large office, observing every detail, Lydia could feel his sweet eyes on her face. He admired the gentle structure that built her. The way she chewed on the side of her cheek absentmindedly. He let his stare linger as she glanced back up at him, like she was waiting for further instructions. </p><p>That was when it hit them the hardest, when they would find themselves staring at each other like they had no control over their own bodies. The pair lingered in the feeling for a few seconds before forcefully turning away. Spencer pulled his hand from her shoulder, moving it to her mid back. </p><p>Neither of them knew it quite yet but just the other's presence alone was like a drug to them. </p><p>It was a longing that Lydia and Spencer would find the words to for a while.</p><p>-</p><p>Spencer was quiet when they came back to the apartment. Lydia just figured that something she did must have upset him. He made his way into his room, closing the door behind him.</p><p>A soft hum came from the young girl's lips as she made her way towards the small kitchen that the apartment held. It was easy to tell that he was very big on cooking. Takeout boxes littered the fridge and random ingredients. This was the bachelor pad of a genius, she didn't expect anything else. </p><p>After seconds of thinking, Lydia came to the conclusion that it was now her job to cheer him up since he had done it so many times for her. "People like food. Why wouldn't he like it?" She mumbled to herself as she pulled a bag of bread from one of the cupboards. The ginger haired girl rummaged through the draws to find something to put on it that wasn't old Chinese food. </p><p>Sighing in defeat, she put back the bread. A small frown sat on her face as she leaned back toward the counter. "How does he have nothing?" Another quiet mumble to herself. Her body turned toward the sink, piled with a small stack of dirty dishes. Her fingers reach to turn on the faucet. Lydia just wanted to be as helpful as she could. After all, he was letting her live with him. What could go wrong?</p><p>The soapy water created a puddle in the sink. Her hand gripped the blue sponge as she scrubbed the food residue from the plastic plates. He still hadn't come out of his room, maybe he was asleep. Lydia took her time cleaning the dishes that sat in his sink. Finally, she put her hand down in the soapy water to grab the last dirty dish. She let out a strangled yelp as her hand came flying out of the murky water. Her palm bleed, a decently deep cut had perforated her hand.</p><p>"What happened? Is something wrong?" A bewildered Spencer Reid emerged from the hallway in nothing more than a Doctor Who t-shirt and plaid boxers. She must have woken him up.</p><p>"I-I'm sorry. I was doing the dishes and I cut myself on accident. I d-didn't see that I grabbed it the wrong way." She had this heavy feeling of guilt in her chest that was hauntingly familiar.  Lydia could feel the tears well up in her eyes as she held the back of her hand with the uninjured one.</p><p>Spencer's worried expression quickly turned to one of compassion and understanding. "It's alright. You just scared me a little." He quietly explained, "Let me see." He held out his hand for hers. She placed her palm in his own. It takes a few seconds for him to examine the wound. "You got yourself pretty good. It'll heal alright as long as you clean it and keep it covered until it starts to scab." He looked down at her with the softest eyes she had ever seen. His deep brown eyes looked like a puppy's. There was a silence as their eyes met. He would never be able to get over how much he loved the emerald color of her orbs. Once again, their stare was broken when he finally looked away. "Let me grab my first aid kit. Wait right here."</p><p>She patiently obeyed his simple request, only taking him a couple seconds to return back from the bathroom with the red bag in hand. He motioned for her to sit in one of the wooden chairs. Spencer kneeled down next to her, placing her limp hand on top of her knee. He took a small cotton ball before soaking it in isopropyl alcohol and grazing it over the cut. </p><p>A hiss escaped her lips. "I'm sorry." The man quietly apologized as he gently cleaned the blood. His tender motions made it more bearable. There was a silence as he helped to clean and bandage the cut. </p><p>"Can I ask you something?" The question came as a surprise to Spencer. His motions came to a stop, giving every single piece of his attention to the girl. </p><p>"Anything."</p><p>Lydia took a deep breath, "W-What was I like before... all of this? Before I lost my memory."</p><p>He didn't know how to respond but he wanted to give her an answer to every single question she had, no matter how hard he had to search for it. At this point, he was wrapped around his finger, willing to do anything for this girl. "Anything specific?"</p><p>She shook her head, glancing down at the halfway bandaged cut and back to Spencer. Her eyes felt watery as she thought about what her life was like before the traumatic events of the past three years. She wanted to know, more than anything. "Not really. I just want answers..."</p><p>"I think that might be a little dangerous, especially how early along you are in your treatm-"</p><p>"Please?" Her voice was coated in desperation. He had never heard her like this before. A tear fell from her eye and down her cheek. Just as fast as it fell, Spencer wiped it away with the warm pad of this thumb.</p><p>"I promise I will try my absolute best." </p><p>Looks like they were going to be in for a visit with the infamous Penelope Garcia.</p>
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